Hi beautiful souls!

Wow- it has been an interesting past few months over here. I have so much to say, yet nothing to say all at the same time. Life has been such a wild ride, with the ups and the downs, the highs and the lows, the excitement and the fear and everything in between. Despite any of that, I’m all here for it. After all, this is the very purpose of life on earth.

A little bit of a back story as to what led me to be here with you today. In April of this year, I went through one of the darkest knights of my soul and was struck with a depth of sadness that truly could only be felt. Days turned into weeks and weeks had turned into months. I was experiencing bouts of depression, severe anxiety and just consumed by the vision of my future, losing sight of the present moment. This experience, these feelings and thoughts were exactly how I felt 5 years prior. I couldn’t wrap my head around it. “How am I in the same space that I was 5 years ago?” “How did this happen?” My life is so great, I have everything I could ever dream of yet simultaneously, I was feeling this deep void within me.

This is what I call: The fear of the unknown

Having ruminating thoughts about what my future holds and feeling this immense sadness, grief & pain of not being where I want to be in my life, both personally and professionally. It was debilitating to say the least.

Fast forward to the end of June- I started to feel lighter, I started to notice the weight of my life, lift up, off my shoulders and I re-gained my sense of love and joy. The 7 weeks that followed, were filled with so much greatness, soaking in every second of the beautiful sunshine summer filled days, connecting with family and friends and making memories that will forever last a lifetime. I was truly in my element, right at home where I belong, living and loving this incredible, abundant life of mine.

Then comes the second week of August and all of a sudden, I started to not feel like myself again. I was hit with this extreme exhaustion and was barely making it through my days. My body was clearly trying to tell me something. I noticed that depth of sadness, creeping back in, losing motivation and desire for even the smallest of things. This was all too familiar. I was having a secondary experience to what I had gone through back in April. Not as extreme, but very comparable.

During the course of these 5 months, I was doing a lot of self-reflecting, re-evaluating and taking a broader look at how I was spending my time and energy throughout my days. One thing that became very clear, and actually had been for some time, (I just chose to ignore it) was my relationship to social media and the toxic overconsumption that was taking place and in turn taking over my life.

Over the years, I have always had this love/hate relationship with social media and I completely understand the toxicity of its nature but I also deeply appreciate the benefits of it. This duality of having both a positive and a negative impact was really weighing on me. I use social media for many different reasons (as a lot of you probably do):

1. Work: Creating content and building my community, inspiring and empowering you to take back control of your life and to re-write your own story.

2. Personal: Connecting with family and friends all over the world, even friends who I have never met in person but have formed relationships through the online space. I love watching and seeing what everyone is up to and to connect with one another. I too, like to share my life with family, friends and my community. I mean after all, humans are wired for connection and this is a beautiful way to stay connected.

3. Inspiration: I love social media to be inspired myself. I love reading and watching others as they share their own trials & tribulations and life stories. Following leaders, coaches, therapists, inspiring individuals who are where I want to be, to be empowered, to gain new knowledge, ideas and perspectives that will enhance my own growth and evolution.

4. News: I don’t watch the news, because lets be real, you can’t trust the MSM so all of the current world events and news stories, I use social media to stay updated and aware of what is happening across the globe.

Now you can imagine, how much time and energy gets spent and wasted on social media platforms. Not only with the aimless scrolling but even when we are using it for the right purposes, it can feel extremely exhausting and depleting. I know this isn’t, or shouldn’t be news to anyone, because I am sure you feel it too, to some extent anyway but here are some things to reflect on…

Have you ever stopped and taken inventory of how much of your day is actually spent online?

How do you feel when you’re online?

How do you feel after?

Do you notice the impact on your mental health?

Are you feeling triggered?

Do you get caught up in the comparison game? Looking at someone else’s life, in a highlight reel and thinking they have it all put together and wondering why you can’t?

Do you find you don’t have enough time in your day to get everything done?

Do you lose sight of your own creativity and ideas because you’re lost in the noise? Does this lead to self-doubt and a feeling of being less than?

These are some questions for you to ponder, reflect on and gain clarity on your relationship to social media and the impact it has on you. There is no judgement here, this is a space to bring awareness and get real honest with yourself.

I’ll be the first to admit, I relate to every one of those questions and have felt the depth of the impact on my mental health and overall health and wellness.

While this can be looked at as a positive change and evolution in technology over the years, which is amazing to see, it has also stripped us of actual face to face human connection; which again to reiterate and emphasize, connection is a basic human need!

Okay, so now this brings me to present moment.

August was such a rough month for me and the more I was self-reflecting and tuning into my body, I knew that I had to make some major changes. If I wanted to get out of this rut I was finding myself in, time and time again, then things had to be different, life had to be different. There needed to be stronger boundaries in place. After much thought and rationalization, I decided to take a social media detox, Instagram specifically as this is where most of my social consumption lies.

It has been 3 weeks exactly as I sit here and share my heart reflections with you all. I had all these doubts leading up to my final decision. It was like this feeling of missing out, as silly as that may sound, thinking “What if I lose my community?”, “What if I miss out on potential clients?” “How will I stay updated on world current events?” “How will I keep up with the algorithm if I’m not posting everyday?” (which by the way, this whole algorithm thing frustrates me so much and feels so mis-aligned. Content that teaches and empowers individuals to do better for themselves, to take control of their overall health and wellness is lost or actually purposely hidden with all the censorship bullshit and posts that are insignificant or do nothing for our mental health are at the top of our feeds. It’s actually insane when you think of it. Okay rant over.)

Now that I am on the other side of my detox, I have come to this deep understanding and realization of how much I actually needed this. And how my decision was in full alignment to what my future self needs/needed despite all of my doubts and fear around taking a break.

Here are the 6 lessons I have learned from my social media detox:

1. Anxiety: Within days of the detox, I noticed how much my anxiety had lessened, even to go as far as saying, it wasn’t even there anymore. I wasn’t caught up in those ruminating thoughts and had the space and time to be fully present with myself. This has been one of the most pivotal benefits of being offline. Of course, my problems haven’t disappeared overnight, but I don’t feel they have a strong grip on me as they did prior.

2. Time: Oh wow, this one is huge. I used to think I had pretty decent boundaries with my time on social media but it became very evident during these 3 weeks, how much of a time-suck social media really is. The amount of time and space that I now have within my days, is incredibly expansive. I’ve even picked up reading again and have finished 2 books and half way through my 3rd during this time-huge win!

3. Energy: Believe it or not, being off social media has actually brought more vitality into my life. It makes total sense though, when we are nourishing our mind, body & soul with information and content that is enriching and thought-provoking, energy levels are much higher but when we are filling our brains with mindless scrolling and things that don’t really matter, that in turn impacts us and we’re left feeling energetically depleted.

4. Connection: The connection that I have with myself, continues to deepen and strengthen, to levels that I didn’t even know were possible. When I am connected and in-tune with my mind, body & soul, I feel nourished and whole. Every day that I cultivate a deeper connection with myself, I am also cultivating a stronger connection with God, the universe and my higher self.

5. Calm & Clarity: I don’t have all the answers, and I don’t think we’re supposed to but since being offline, I have really leaned in and found clarity with where my heart and soul lie. There’s this new sense of direction and coming into more alignment with what I desire rather than what I think I should because of some stranger on the internet. I truly feel at peace and right at home.

6. Habitual Behaviors: This is a big one! Rather than deleting the Instagram app, I just moved it to the back of my phone, (whereas before it was on the main page) and I turned off all the notifications. I had told myself, that if I am finding myself reaching for it, or swiping to the last page then I will fully delete it to avoid this from happening. To my surprise, I never once even thought about it. Out of sight, out of mind. This was eye-opening, and I mean I was aware of these unconscious thought patterns we all have but it was so clear to me, how much of an automatic response it was, just to open up my phone and press the Instagram app, without any intention or even realizing that’s what I was doing. This is a problem. This is not okay.

   How many of you can relate to this? Or now have the awareness, that you too possess this habitual behavior?

Life continues to be a wild ride, with challenges, roadblocks and fear of the unknown but what I have learned and gained over these last several weeks is invaluable. I have been able to restore balance, peace and harmony all while enjoying the simple pleasures of life.

Now, this social detox is not a forever thing. I actually miss connecting in with my community and sharing my heart, my gifts with the world. It truly lights my soul on fire, in the most radiant, fierce, expansive way. I am currently doing a challenge that has allowed me to hold myself on an entire different edge than I have experienced before, mind, body & soul and at the end of this month, I will be doing a monthly pulse check and re-evaluating my goals and intentions for the month of October. I may speak to this edge in another blog post, (because there’s so much to say!), but for now, I am feeling like it’s time to come back online.

The awareness, habits and the new behaviors that I have gained and implemented throughout all of this will allow me to stay true to who I am all while continuing to nourish my physical and mental health above all else. I have this new-found love for blogging and have had some creative insights come through, that will help honor my boundaries and relationship to social media.

See you on the other side<3

With love & gratitude,

Sara Jaswal